You should still get married even if you can’t have a wedding celebration.
It’s a MARRIAGE, not a wedding. When you decide to marry your spouse, you are not choosing to marry them because you want a big wedding celebration. You are not marrying them because you want the “show” or the “event.” You are marrying your soon-to-be spouse because you plan to commit a lifetime to one another. You simply choose each other.
Ryan and I postponed our wedding 3 weeks before our day of commitment. And later, we had to decide on how to move forward. Do we still get married and follow the guidelines of no more than 10 people and stand 6ft apart? Or do we wait until the new date?
This was another big decision we had to make as a soon-to-be-married couple. And it wasn’t a decision that we quickly made.
If I am honest, for the first week (or two), I didn’t even think about our wedding (or the marriage, I should say) after we decided to postpone. But as time went by, it became a topic of discussion.
Do we let worldly circumstances determine the day we say our vows?
Or do we still keep the day we had set to make our promise to God and one another?
In life, we know things will not always go our way. Our prayers will not always be answered. Closed doors don’t always seem like a blessing. Opened doors may seem hard to come by. But whatever it is, we know sometimes circumstances are not always in our favor. And Coronavirus just happened to be one of our obstacles prior to our wedding day.
But with much thought, wise counsel, and talks with our father (Our Heavenly Father), we decided not to let the postponement of our wedding, postpone what God had planned for us.
We chose not to let the circumstance of the current world stop us from following the will of God. And that is when two are united into one. A marriage is a gift from God, and Ryan and I wanted to honor that privilege. To be one. To be in covenant with God.
So we decided to still get married.
After all, it is a marriage, not a wedding.
With moving forward, we also had to make other decisions. Who would be there? How do we choose? Is it fair that my parents would not physically be there?
Deciding on these options took some time and thought, but after further reflection, Ryan and I concluded that it will be just us two. This was our opportunity to honor God as two individuals becoming one, as husband and wife, without the wedding party, without our guests, and without the wedding celebration. The focus was on our marriage. Our vows, our commitment to each other, and our promise to God.
April 3rd, 2020 at 6:00 pm.
Our original date and time.
Our marriage day!
And it was beautiful.
Wedding Details
There were some key details we decided to wait to do for our actual wedding celebration. We kept our vows traditional, as we plan to say our own vows at the new date. I didn’t wear my wedding dress. Ryan didn’t wear his tux. And both our parents were not there. Our wedding ceremony will indeed be a wedding celebration for all our family and friends.
But, there were also some details we kept the same. We had a wedding cake still (read below), so we used our cake cutting set. Ryan and I still had a toast with our flutes. And we still had our steak dinner! We made our own wedding celebration with just the two of us! Husband and Wife.
On a side note: Brides, do not feel like you need to buy all NEW wedding items for your new wedding date. Your family and friends will understand. It’s part of your story. (Ryan and I plan to use all the items we purchased with our 4/3/2020 wedding date).
Next, I certainly need to THANK my new in-laws!
One, they completely understood not having them there to witness our marriage even though they live in Las Vegas. They emphasized with me by not having my parents be there, who live in Ohio. My in-laws didn’t want to take away from their special moment of seeing their little girl get married. So both our parents will see us for the first time when we say our vows to each other on our new wedding day.
Not only did they understand not being there, but they also helped arrange the entire day! My father-in-law made our wedding arch, my mother-in-law and Ryan’s Aunt (or Nina) helped decorate the archway, Nina made us a wedding cake. They did everything and anything to help make our day special. THANK YOU! I love you and I am so blessed to be part of your family.
And it was absolutely, so special!
Overall, our wedding day was not at all what we had planned, nor foresaw. It wasn’t what we expected or prepared for. But what we do know is that any circumstance can bring honor to God. Ryan and I chose to still honor God by still getting married.
It’s Your Love Story
But it all comes down to what is important to you as a bride and groom. Your love story is not the same as your neighbor’s love story. You should decide what is best for you and your soon-to-be spouse. This is, yet again, another major decision you will have to make. First, postponing, and now, do you wait or proceed? But the real question you need to ask yourself is, what are you comfortable with? If you feel any doubt or a tug in your heart, don’t ignore that feeling. Pray about it. Once you determine your answer, you will know what to do. Your soon-to-be spouse will love you no matter what, and your family and friends will support you know matter what. It’s your day. Your decision!
If there are any brides out there reading this, I would love to know what you decided to do or did. Please share your thoughts or your story in the comments below.
Congratulations Ryan & Victoria ❤️❤️